2003-12-16

Well the 40 degree days are helping to dry me out somewhat, if only in the sense of sucking up moisture from the carpets spread out in the backyard...

Saturday had a party with the C-gal (joint birthday) and made mucho killer margaritas which brought about the downfall of several boys who had shown up with the machismo thinking it was going to be some pussy girls party. Little did they know i had practised my margarita skills in mexico when I was there in 2000 and was gentle with the ice and heavy with the tequila and lime juice. Ha ha! There were bodies sprawled across the dancefloor by 3am.

Am feeling discombobulated by hormonal rushes and the lack of an office at work, and the lack of access to a computer for a week and a half (I didn't realise I spent so much time in front of a terminal) and by the lack of something better to think about than the festive season. I really don't have any kind of major thoughts about christmas; I was a Jehovah's Witness until I was 14 and that kind of put the kibosh on having any happy childhood memories associated with this particualr time of year. Yeah yeah its a commercial enterprise nowdays and its all about the dollar, but seriously, what isn't? Its easy to have fun without spending money but its so much more fun to blow a whole week's wages on a few hours of drinking and carousing. I think I must be missing a responsibility gene somedays.

A new philosophy has entered my consciousness of late, and it centers around the phrase "why the hell not?". I am tired of coming up with excuses not to do stuff cause I can't 'afford' it or cause I have to work, or because the its the cat's dinnertime. So amazingly enough I have just been doing stuff lately, and enjoying it. I am sure if I had a therapist there would be some deep dark reason for this spate of hedonism, but as it stands I'm having a good time and Amex can reposses my car if they choose - although what Amex will do with a 32 year old Volkswagen is beyond me.

So I'm playing, and it feels good, and it feels like opportunities are coming my way once more, and that there may be a light at the end of this emotionally spooky tunnel. There's so much cool stuff in the world, and I dig it all!!!!

Oh yes, and I must offer a retraction on my last entry after a missive from a certain deity - nature is not the biggest thing in life. Apparently the biggest thing is a shiny shoe wearing chrome domed fmeh from the south side of the Yarra; I guess I should have known better.

Speaking of egos, how fucking good was Robbie Williams?!! I felt fourteen again, screaming and creaming my pants over some guy on a stage so far away that i had to use binoculars to get the tiniest glimpse. It was amazing just to be in the same stadium as him (you may notice a slight note of sarcasm beginning to creep in here). But oh it was ace, and I went home and rubbed myself raw with thinking about being shagged by a cocky English rugby boy (or two). Marriage is definately not the end of my "rich fantasy life". ha ha!

bitch - moan