2004-08-02

Looking for work in all the wrong places...

I have sent out so many resumes that I am starting to feel like an employment company myself. Buying the paper and looking for jobs is fascinating, just to see how many different types of things there are to do in the world. I wonder what makes someone decide that a career in sanitation management and works is the right job for them? Or is it the same for everybody as it is for me - do we just find something and that takes us down a pathway? There are also a lot of 'what ifs' - what if i had become a lawyer like I started out thinking I would be, what if i had done the communications course at UTS instead of the 'flaky' theatre Com course I did at Bathurst? And what if i'd stayed with my first proper job at the Aboriginal Dance company? Would my life be more meaningful?

No matter what happens I think you can come to the end of your life, and if you are lucky enough to have some reflection time, look back at all the shining trails you have left behind and ask 'what if I had done things differently'? I think I will be content with what I have done, and I think I am a strong enough person to take responsibility for my actions. I just don't want that final question to be met with nothing. I want to have the options and to have the choice. For fuck's sake, i live in the western world in a developed country (alright, so its run by a monkey, but hey, not forever)and I do have plenty more options than about 80% of the rest of the world. I am so lucky! I am not going to look back in anger, i am going to look back and smile and be grateful for my miserable little life. Damn it, why not just be happy?

Hmm, reflective on a Monday. I really need to get a job soon.

bitch - moan